Case. Number 2658: Journal entry 3

10.30.16

22:00

"Just because you love someone it does mean you should could save them."

I found this in my journal this morning. I didn't write it. I don't even remember falling asleep. If I even was asleep. It was like I was someone else. I could see and hear everything around me but... when I spoke, it wasn't my voice. When I tried to collect my thoughts they weren't mine. No, these thoughts were those of someone who had no soul. Someone who smiled at sadness, laughed at loss, and thrived in chaos. I didn't like these thoughts. I felt my soul shrivel away from the crude images that flashed through the mind of this sadistic man I was now apart of. Bloody corpses, pleading victims, mangled bodies of those too young to comprehend their fate.

As more and more and more of those ungodly thoughts raced from his mind to mine I couldn't help it. I tried to feel horrified but I only felt awakened, powerful, and righteous. I began see what joys he sought out in life, or should I say death.

His every lust was now pumping through my veins. His fiery passion for decay now fueled my heart. I was no longer me. I no longer longed for the need of my love. I no longer thrived for the beauty of the world. Now, all I craved was the sensation of carving flesh piece after piece. I needed to feel the tissue of my prey open up and spill out what was meant to be concealed. And I did. My mind now overrun with these new found urges I felt the rush of stalking my victim. I felt the urgency to carefully follow my prey, watching their every move, their every interaction. Remaining a part of the shadows until I could strike. Telling myself to be patient. Soon I will feel your blood run over my skin. Soon I will laugh at your weakening pleas. 

Stop? Let you go?

 How could I when your blood warms me so.
Oh no.

I'll watch as the life drains from your eyes. 

Leaving only emptiness but forever remaining surprised. 
I'll dance to the sound of your breaking bones. 

As I sing along with your greying tone. 
And the smell, oh how I long for this.

The smell of your life now scented with death.

If you believe in God I'd call him fast.

You better hurry we're about to pass.

I finally have you, your finally mine.

We'll take this slow we have time.

One little slice and the fun begins. 

Another slice and your life starts to end.

You may hope for freedom, you may pray for bliss.

But you'll never find it in my abyss.

I now walk with death beside me. A mutual respect for each others handy work. 

10.31.16

1:00

I don't know what's happening to me. First of all that last entry I don't remember writing. And that sick poem is downright terrifying. Who gets off on something like that. Cutting people, indulging in the presence of death. That's unnatural. It's psychotic, the acts of a true monster. But why do I feel so... understanding? Something is wrong here. I need my husband.

1:09

I'm sorry for the confusing writing, I can't get my thoughts together. Every time I try to focus on something that used to bring me joy I get lost. There a new hunger in me that I can't seem to push aside. I tried searching for my husband again but I keep finding myself at the abandoned building. I went all around the forest as far away from that place as possible but I kept coming to it. How am I supposed to find my liebe when I can't even get away for this damned place. I need to smoke.

2:00

I think I'm going crazy. I found myself sitting in the driver's seat of the van covered in blood. I'm facing the abandoned building, there's a blood trail in front of the van leading to, what I can only assume is, the door hatch in the floor. I haven't left the van since I came too, I'm sure I wasn't sleeping because I feel like I've been awake since yesterday. No, this is something else. Why haven't I left yet?

2:49

What's happening to me? I can't help myself from smiling as I stare at the trail of blood. I stop as soon as I realize it but as quickly as I wipe it off my face it's back again.  I've been staring at it for far too long wishing it'll just go away. But, something about it seems... familiar? Almost satisfying. Like I'm admiring an artist's work. I cant follow it I just can't. But I have too, it has to be connected to the reason why I'm covered in blood. Yeah, I'm still covered in blood. I look like carry after those assholes dumped pig blood all over her. 

3:00

Let's have some fun.

3:10

You are an excellent student.

3:20

He had it coming.

3:30

Next one we'll take our time

3:40

I'm so proud of you.

3:50

We're going to have even more fun in the future. This will never have to end. 

4:00

I had to find out. I had to know what happened. At 3 am I decided to finally go check out the mysterious blood trail. And guess where it ended. If you said the door in the floor that  your wrong, but at least you rhymed. No this trail took me far beyond the abandoned building. I walked in the forest for a good 30 minutes before spotting what was the cause of the trail. In front of a giant boulder sat a human figure. It was hunched over in an unnatural way and there was a pool of blood surrounding it. As I inched closer I notice the figure was missing is head. Chopped clean off, very clean. A perfect cut right along the neck. Butchers would be proud of whosoever handy work this was.

You would think finding a body with a missing head would have me running in the other direction, but oddly I felt nothing. It felt normal to me, like I was around rotting corpses on a daily basis. I even searched the protect for identification, Willard walker. A college student from Washington state. Poor bastard. Should've prayed harder. Sorry I couldn't find your head. 

Well I'm back at the van now. I haven't heard much of anything since last night. No voices, haven't seen any shadows, I haven't even seen any animals. Is that weird? Something is wrong with my cameras as well. I've been trying to fix them but every time I go to look at the footage all I can hear are overlapping voices. I tried to make out what some of them were saying but I couldn't. Maybe tomorrow, or more correctly, later on today I can get them working.  

4:45

I better clean up before my husband wakes up.